Jesus Wept

Panorama shot of Our Lady of Peace from my seat *click to enlarge*

It's hard to say that I had a good time at a funeral. But when I say I had a good time at Dani's funeral today, understand this is exactly how she would have wanted it.

This year was to be the "Year of Dani" as she often put it. She had a plan to get herself together physically, spiritually, and professionally. She dubbed this effort "Operation Daffodil". The daffodil symbolizes rebirth and new beginnings. This year Danielle wanted to begin anew and bring herself back to center. With Danielle's passing, it looks like her rebirth and new beginning has realized itself. She completed "Operation Daffodil" this past Sunday, nearly a week ago, when she slipped the bonds of this Earth and ascended into the choirs of Heaven.

"Operation Daffodil" Thank you to Mary Anne,
a long time friend of Danielle's for
giving me this daffodil

You may not believe in this vision of the afterlife, but Danielle did. During her funeral mass her faith was described in the Homily. She loved her church, her priests, and all that came with it. The exciting stuff like singing every Sunday, and the mundane, like organizing a parish raffle. As I looked up at the ceiling, feeling tears coming, I noticed a small detail. The lights directly above my head, hanging from the ceiling, was swaying. I looked at all the others and they were still, but the one above my head swayed gently the entire time.

After communion Jim Donovan took the pulpit to deliver a eulogy to end all eulogies. Jim described Danielle's life with all the passion and excitement as a Browns game on Sundays. At times his memories shed tears, and within minutes he had us all laughing as he recounted fond memory after fond memory. He gave us comfort. He gave us closure. Laughter is the best medicine, and even as we all laughed, we still had tears shrink wrapped on our eyes. At the end of the eulogy Jim offered a prediction. Danielle was the biggest Indians fan in all of Cleveland, and now that she is passed he predicted that the Indians will win the World Series this year, because now they have someone in Heaven that can effect their game.

As we left behind Danielle's casket flanked with co-workers, friends, and family I took a quick look back at that light above where I sat. It was motionless.

Danielle had left the building and Jesus wept.

Remembering a Friend

Danielle (purple shirt) giving a tour of WKYC to the PIO MOD Squad on Friday January 18, 2013

There are never enough good words to describe who or what Danielle was to all of us. She was full of life and energy. Devoted to her work, her friends, her family, and above all else God. She always spoke of her mother who had passed like she was just on a vacation. 

If you followed her on Twitter you found her enthusiasm for life infectious. She was always upbeat and positive despite reasons to be anything but. She meant so much to so many and we can all create entire Thesaurus' devoted to words that could describe her. The best way to remember someone is to tell stories. 

Danielle and I had a lot of fun this past summer. We both covered the "Hotter in Cleveland" full scale disaster drill. That's where we met. We had so much fun. We would ask the wet behind the ears intern that was with us these strange questions, and dammit if he didn't find answers to them. We had great fun. Later in the Summer we sailed on the USS DeWert to Detroit with another friend Erica Creech from the Department of Safety. That trip was amazing despite how it ended. We both had bags stolen from a car while we ate dinner, but in the end her optimism about the situation was amazing and kept me from falling into a depression about it. I was fortunate to attend a Tribe game with Danielle. If you want to see a true fan, Danielle is your girl. Where many of us have abandon the team like a condemned building, she pulled on her HAZMAT suit and hung in there. She was so excited about the pending 2013 season. 

Danielle (left) at "Hotter in Cleveland" 

Today when I learned she had passed, I learned a lot about Danielle. I learned she was my biggest cheerleader and fan. She liked my photography and she told a lot of folks about it. I have gotten direct messages all afternoon telling me that she said all these things about me. I had no idea. Danielle was the reason I was on TV this past week. She gave all she could to her friends. She really showed them she cared at all times. If you tweeted you were having a bad day, she was there trying to lift you up. I am forever grateful for all the words of encouragement she has given me. I continue to be inspired by her life and how many lives she touched. I am glad I could and can call her my friend.

This past Friday was the last time I saw and spoke with Danielle. She was giving a tour of Channel 3 to, what I would call, the PIO MOD Squad. Most folks would be a good host and get us drinks, but Danielle took it step further and got us dinner and snacks. She always went above and beyond for her friends and colleagues, you will hear this anytime someone talks about her.

I can't imagine the hurt and pain WKYC is feeling in their newsroom. All of Cleveland is mourning tonight. Danielle will be missed, but I know she is dancing with her mother now. 

Danielle you are loved. You are missed. It was a privilege to call you a friend. 

This is not good-bye. This is just see you later. 

BURN: The Review

It is hard to describe how I feel after seeing BURN. Really really hard. A part of me is pissed off. Pissed off that a city seems to be hanging out its public safety divisions out to dry. They aren't addressing the issues within the city. They are dangerously close to insolvency and instead of sharing the burden with everyone, they target the biggest line item on the budget, police and fire.

That is no way to run a city. That is no way to run a country. The federal government has balked at the idea of cutting defense, but in the city government they cut the defense first and ask questions later. We are not a third world country and having money to pay firemen is amazing, but the Detroit Fire Department fights more fire arson than any other city in America and yet they have the least amount of resources. A travesty in my eyes. 

There are other issues at work in Detroit causing this travesty besides the elected officials downtown. You have a declining population, high poverty rate, high unemployment rate, and Michigan hasn't come up with a way to attract all the manufacturing plants that have left Detroit to give 29% of their population jobs. So what you have left is a shell that has a rotten middle. It was said in the film, a gallon of gas is still cheaper than a movie ticket. 

Putting this whole situation in Detroit in context, Cleveland has done a fantastic job at reinventing what it is. LTV Steel could have been our Detroit moment. The moment large manufacturing started fleeing the city our medical community was expanding and started bringing jobs into Cleveland. Detroit didn't start to decline quickly. It has been a slow process. It will be a slow process to bring it all back. 

There is another part of me that is just bashing my head against the wall. You see all the time that FEMA is passing out grants for all sorts of things all over the country. Why isn't Detroit seeing any of this money? I think the reason is simple. No one in Detroit has applied for them. That is on the shoulders of the Fire Commissioner, plain and simple. I see suburban departments getting new apparatus all the time, partly because they have a good source of funding, partly because someone in the department has the ability to write a grant and get the free money out there for them.

Detroit isn't a lost cause, BURN shows us in the 90 minute run time. Detroit just needs leadership. They need a mayor willing to back them up. They need a commissioner to advocate to the city for them. They need people like Dan Gilbert buying up property in the city and re-purposing them (see also: Horseshoe Casino in Cleveland). They need to the will to want to change. 

BURN needs to be seen by every single elected official, every fire chief, and every firefighter across the nation. This movie needs to be seen by every citizen who pays their fire department for protection. They need to see how their money is being spent. They need to know it is being used in their best interest. 

Will this movie change minds? It could. It could also be written off as union propaganda, and the truth of the matter, it is the most true story about being a firefighter I have ever seen. Listening to firefighters talk about the movie over a beer afterwards there is one thing that was consistent, "The fires were cool, but once they started talking about the politics of the whole thing, the movie got real."

Fore more information about this movie, Detroit Fire Department, and how you could help go to Detroitfirefilm.org. 

Clarification

Did you see me on TV today?



Well I just wanted to make a few things a little clearer, as I have gotten a ton of questions today from all over the place.

1. I am not affiliated with BURN the movie. I am just a local artist who requested a screening in Cleveland. You want to go to DetroitFireFilm.org for more details about the movie and to get your tickets for tonight. I know they sold out their show Monday night, and tonight I am sure there will be another large showing. Was kind of bummed they only used the images from the film on the segment and not my images as they had 7 of them ready to go, but I had no control over that. Oh well.

2. Two Detroit firefighters will be at the screening tonight are Brendan Milewski and Dave Parnell. They lived it. Their stories are amazing and tell them thank-you for everything they do. I am happy they are still with us as many of their friends paid the ultimate sacrifice in their efforts to help the people of Detroit.

3. I give all my photography to the fire departments I photograph. My mission is to give them a record of what they do on a daily basis. Families like to see what their dad, mom, wife, husband, brother, or sister do on a daily basis. I am honored anytime they are used. Rarely do I get paid. No complaints, just the way it is.

4. I would love to see Cleveland get a fire photographer on the payroll and put us in the firehouses with the firefighters who protect the city. Whether that is me or not, there are a lot of talented fire photographers here in Cleveland, we could use a full-timer in the department showing you what it is really like.

 I was super happy to be on TV talking about something I am passionate about. Fire photography is a form of art that is both dangerous and rewarding. I love doing what I do, and I am energized that a feature length documentary about firefighters is here in town. Again, without firefighters and a fire department willing to open themselves up, and without a crew of photographers, engineers, and directors like Tom Putnam and Brenna Sanchez, BURN doesn't happen; it doesn't change minds, it doesn't show you what really goes on in a city with more arson that any other city in America.

Support Detroit and Support BURN.

Shot in the Dark

I hear the dryer going in the other room. Turns out when you are going to be on TV you need clean clothes. Who knew? So last night, BURN premiered in Cleveland to a sold out show ( I get to go tonight and see it and I'm jacked!). Today I go on live TV talking about the film and my fire photography and what it all means.

To say I am nervous about it is an understatement. I've done live TV before and even still I have those butterflies. TV Cameras, lights, and a host can turn the most articulate of people into babbling idiots. I have been trying to tell myself that that won't happen, but who knows, it's live TV. Part of me feels I need to do something that will make it go viral. Some suggestions from Facebook were to pick my nose, release a flatulent  or even set a fire on the desk and pull out my camera. All would do the trick at the expense of my credibility, but hell I like where their heads are.

In reality I just hoping to put some exposure on a film that should be distributed wide by Hollywood and isn't. Why? Who knows, but this film needs to be seen by everyone in the country. Detroit Fire Department is what happens when you cut and cut and cut and you have a growing number of abandon houses; and gas and matches cost less than a movie ticket.

Arson is a scary thing. It is scary for residents and terrifying for firefighter's families. Arsonists kill firemen. Period. If there was any Midwestern city that closely resembles Detroit it would be Cleveland. Detroit is rising like a phoenix from the ashed because of their firemen. Cleveland isn't on fire because of it's firemen. Detroit needs to be supported, despite that University up there.

If you are reading this after seeing me on TV; welcome, hope I didn't babble like an idiot. You can contact me right here by commenting, clicking on my contact tab and filling out the form, or tweet me. I put a lot of photos on Flickr so head over there if you want to see more stuff.

January has been my month so far. A photo of mine published in Cleveland Magazine, an appearance on TV talking about a genre of photography that is making a surge to mainstream, and hopefully it ends in a paying gig somewhere, somehow.

2013, thanks for showing up for me so far. Don't mess it up.

Burn

When I first saw the 9 minute trailer for a documentary called 'Burn' I was blown away. This was in the beginning stages of me falling down the fire photography rabbit hole. Burn showed a side of firefighting you cannot get from films like 'Backdraft' or 'Ladder 49' or even TV shows like 'Emergency!' or 'Chicago Fire'.

All those films and TV shows have their place in entertainment, they are all well done for what they are. But 'Burn' was something different. It wasn't a stylized replication of what firefighters go through on a daily basis in Detroit; it's actually what is happening. The footage in the film is almost a few years old at this point, but I think the film shines a spotlight on many aspects of firefighting that many of us don't even know about. 

We see firemen step off the rig in gear, grab tools, and go into fires. We never see what happens on the inside. In this 9 minute trailer, it shows you the heat, the disorientation, and the heartbreak that comes with a home burning to the ground. 

Finally this film is coming to Cleveland and I have my tickets purchased and ready to go. I can't wait to go there. I would love for you to join me in supporting this film and the brave members who see more fire in 24 hours than most firemen across the country might see in a year or even a career.

This movie also does great things in the way of supporting and creating space in city budgets for professional fire photographers. This film proves that the pictures and video we capture have a place in the discussion about firefighting. Without a group of dedicated filmmakers, photographers, and engineers putting cameras on helmets, this movie never happens.

You can buy tickets for January 14th or 15th, showing at Tower City. If you are a firefighter attending the show on the 15th with me bring your helmet and come 30 minutes early. I want to get some photos of Cleveland supporting Detroit Fire Department and the filmmakers and we can meet the some of the Detroit Firefighters that are featured in the film.  

Tickets are $20.00 online. This is not a typical price for a movie, but this is not a typical movie and it is being delivered in an atypical way. The directors and producers are raising money to put this DVD out by themselves. This is a daunting task with a high cost. 

For tickets go here. 

To donate go to detroitfirefilm.org

A New Year, A New Portfolio

Rocking a bow tie on New Year's Eve

Why does January 1st feel so refreshing?

2012 was a crappy year for many reasons all of which I have gone into depth here, but the last half of the year brought a ton of awesome to the lives of family. 

I cannot describe how supportive everyone has been. From an anonymous donor replacing a camera that was stolen to seemingly strangers coming into my life with nothing but love. These past few weeks have shown me the good in the people of Cleveland and frankly all over. 

Because of the kindness of a Twitter follower, I received a gift card for Shutterfly for the specific purpose of reprinting my lost portfolio. Their generous donation was big enough to not only reprint the 12 page book, but also add 43 additional pages. I was able to put together a comprehensive portfolio that was laid out the way it should have been from the start. It has over 100 photos ranging from the fire service to plants & animals. The cover is custom now, so just sitting it on a table is enough to start a conversation. 

It will be coming this week and I cannot wait for it to arrive. Follow the link below to get a preview. 2013 holds a lot of secrets and I am excited to find them. This year will be my year. Something will break loose. 

I am determined. 

I am focused. 

Check out the portfolio here.